attn: interweb surfers

i just wanted to take the time and thank you for 

finding my blog through the following searches:

ilovehp

azn gangster 13@hotmail.com

can't stop watching alana toddlers and tiaras

chin zit

freeolive.com

classy acrylic nails

getting my arm casted

hipster sitting

my finger is not straight

you know what they say about guys with big trucks

receding hairline side part

ernest hamwi

people who say nom nom

wolf pack diagram

honey boo boo chiiiiiild

beeper king

a zit on the bottom lip

ethan tremblay headshot

emma watson

fingerstache

you're the sister of my soul i dream

nothing grows in shadows of my cock

teen webcam

i have no idea how those last three are connected to me.

no idea at all.

i find it unsettling. 

and finally,

can someone please tell me why anyone is searching,

"brissa sigh"?

like really.

i don't get it. 

attn: boy in class

i don't know how or why you do it,

but i must applaud you.

now please, tell us.

how on earth do you get your hair so high

and is it true you're paying homage to jimmy neutron?

and the the slit sensor-shades?

don't mention it. 

i know you like to keep it phresh in all aspects of life. 

peace out homez.

this is why she's my bff jill.

last night i went to a professional basketball game.

like, i actually wanted to go.

this whole "brissa starting to like/care about sports" thing 

is out of control.

but don't worry, 

i spent a good ten minutes looking for khlo-khlo 

cheering her man on from the sidelines.

i couldn't find her anywhere.

i spent the rest of my time yelling...

stupid khloe for not being in the same arena as me.

stupid officials for not calling penalties and favoring dirk.

stupid dirk. go back to germany.

stupid mavs.

stupid jazz for losing.

ugh.

i'm making myself sick.

this is out of hand.
srsly.

save.me.

party over here {woot woot!}

i tricked you.

there is no party over here.

just me. in my cubicle. eating craisins.

das wassup.

with my afternoon class cancelled,

i'm able to go home earlier than planned.

aka: high noon.

best start to a three day weekend ever.

i hope you enjoy your weekend

and keep rocking the whites

after labor day,

because you're not in the navy

and you can. 

oh, and just a quick question,

is there a reason for this?

i mean....reaaaally?!

attn: google+

i haaaaate you.

i deleted my picasa web albums 

because i didn't want that junk all over my profile.

seems reasonable, right?

well, as it turns out,

when you delete your web albums,

it deletes the pictures you have on your blog.

!?!?!!??!wtf!?!?!!??!

now i'm going to have to go back and insert pictures where they got erased.

so if i accidentally clog up your reader, 

i'm sorry.

if it gets to be too annoying,

i'll bake you a cupcake,

build you a robot,

or give you a unicorn. 

i have honestly, never wanted to junk cut something this bad.

#$@!)@($!()@*#%&!@#*(

strike two...

remember that time 

a tree branch almost hit me 

while i walked to work today?

one foot to the right

and it would have been a crime scene.

i think the universe is out to get me. 

attn: blogger

sometimes you give me the heebie jeebies.

sincerely, 

brissa. 

alarm clock 2.0

remember that time i woke up 

to my glass light cover exploding

and shattering all over my floor?

yeah...me too...

to answer your question,

no.

despite what you've been told,

duct tape does not fix everything.

sidenote: for those of you who have asked and shown concern,

thank you for your genuine worry.

but unfortunately {or rather, fortunately},

this is not my car. 

i found this blue beauty in the parking lot and thought i'd share.

so while i thank you for the positive vibes, 

let's send them over to the owner of the civic 

so they can get this sucker sorted out.

but really, you kids are top-notch for caring.

a blogger's prayer.

now i lay me down to sleep,

i pray the lord my blog to keep.

if it should die before i wake,

i pray my posts it doth not take.

because if you do, 

i'll junk cut you so bad

you'll wish you had a steel jockstrap. 

aaaaaamen.

every time i attempt to spell

"yaaay"

on my iphone

it auto corrects it to

"gassy."

really, apple?

for a "smart phone," you are really dumb.

wednesday thoughts.

wtf...
did that really just happen?
really?

bought nutella for the 

first time in my life yesterday.

#winning.

sometimes i like to text/blog/email

in tweet-speak.

#becauseilikeitooookkaayy?

uhhhh....

please tell me i'm not the only one disturbed by this.

on a sidenote: why are babies drinking evian?

oh, p.s. if that one didn't creep you out try this one.
i'm so confused as to why lybia is obsessed with baby commericals.
i can't stop shuddering. 

in other news

we had a hailstorm on sunday.

it went from this

to this in 17 seconds flat. 

and by seven that evening the sun was shining 

and children were frolicking in the fields.

sometimes i think mother nature is a schizophrenic
 and utah is her bi-polar personality.

oh hey friday, when'd you get here?

 today i checked my tweeter.

guess who's following me?

uuuhh...whhhhat?!

i'd like you to note that i am not following the former/current mrs. pratt.

first mr. kingston, then the hoff and now miss montag.

i feel so fortunate to have the truly elite of hollywood stalking my tweets.

aaand for those of you who couldn't detect it,

that last statement? 

it was dripping in sarcasm.

she should be punished

i just saw a girl carrying mockingjay.

she said she bought it the week it came out and

"hasn't gotten to it yet."

?!?!?!!?WTF?!?!?!!?

that should have been her first priority last year!!!

i mean, i know it took me a little while to finish

but honestly, seven months?!?!

what is wrong with people these days?

the hunger games wait for no one.

holy freak it's march?!?!?!?!

whhhhhat?!

i think my stomach just exploded...

starbucks has done the unthinkable
and created a size bigger than the venti (591 mL).
introducing the trenta.
a cup that is 16 mL bigger than the average capacity of an adult human stomach.
confused with all the numbers?
here's a diagram for you visual learners {aka: me}

honestly, what is this going to do for anyone?
those drinks are freaking HUGE
and have "enough caffeine to stand in for a defibrillator."
i find it ridiculous.
i also think it's just another reason for europe to poke fun
at our obsession with  all things
big.
big.
big.
oh, and another contributor to our
problem of obesity.
think of how many kids guzzle these iced beverages?
if that's an average adult stomach,
a kid's is smaller.
i honestly think stomachs will explode and people will go crazy
as a result of so much caffeinated drank.

but it's perrrrfect for hot chocolate.
mmm baby!

honest abe.

Okay here's the deal.
I haven't actually "gotten ready" for class in about three days now.  I am alway running late so I only have time to put on clothes, run a brush through my hair and (depending on the day) leave it down or throw on a headband and pull it back into a high ponytail or low bun.  Today was one of those days. 
It's on days like today that I always run into someone I know who  exclaims, "Oh my gosh!  You look so cute!"  And here's what I want to know.  Are they blind?!  I look awful.  I'm not wearing make up, I've paired wife beaters with a cardigan, my gold&bronze headbands are keeping my high messy bun in place and my moccassins were the first shoes I saw.  How on earth is that cute?   I also wonder if this person {usually a girl} is lying to me because she feels socially obligated to comment on how I look because she hasn't seen me in "ages." 
Just be honest!  I hate it when people give fake compliments because that's what they think people want to hear.  When complimenting someone you should be genuine about it.  That way I know I can trust you when you compliment me for real and I won't think you're just lying to say something I want to hear.
Honesty has always been the best policy. 
And if you're looking for the truth, you'd better be prepared for it.