this sickness has got to go.

i started writing this past weekend down in list form

and i realized it would be 100% confusing to try to understand it

if you weren't me or cory.

and, i mean, i know that's how most of my wiiknd lists go, 

but this one was getting ridiculous.

so here's the deal.

cory had to finish up an install project on saturday which had him

gone most of the day.

like 9-7.

i woke up with half a sore throat

and my left ear aching. 

it wasn't great, but it was manageable. 

it got progressively worse as the day wore on

and morphed into body aches, chills to hot flashes, dizziness, nausea.

you know, all that good stuff.

every time cory asked me how i was doing,

i simply told him my head and throat hurt.

mostly because i felt this, while accurate, would have been too dramatic.

by six i couldn't take it anymore,

so cory called his dad to come over and help.

god bless daddy al. 

he took jude while i brought ezra in bed with me

and let him kick while i slowly died.

the next thing i knew, cory was right by my side with the most worried look on his face.

i guess my "i'm fine" texts weren't suuper accurate

which led to a quick but real talk about me needing to be honest

via text when i'm basically dying. 

he brought me a sprite and a sea salt caramel talenti

and i could have kissed him right on the mouth if i weren't worried about infecting him.

cory took the best care of me all night.

he made me dinner and played with my hair.

he rubbed my shoulders and turned on my lavender diffuser. 

he pumped me full of medicine and let me rest.

yeah, serious heart eyes over here.

sunday was worse than saturday.

we ended up at "insta"care only to wait one and a half hours

before we got seen by the doctor. 

"it's strep." 

i opted for the penicillin shot in my [almost] butt

and found out i wouldn't be contagious after 24 hours.

we stopped by fresh market on our way back home

for ginger ale, saltines and some aunt jemima butter syrup

cuz, yolo. 

we also made a pit stop at maverick

for an xxl cup of pebble ice and a ddp.

cory took the babes downstairs while i scoured netflix for some decent trash tv.

n o t h i n g. 

hulu ended up saving the day with real world: skeletons. 

after jude went down for the night,

i asked cory if he wanted to come in bed to watch tv with me.

"i mean, i wanna spend time with you,

but i don't want to be near you..."

understandable.

what with the germs and all.

after an hour i tricked him into letting me go downstairs to be with him 

with some ice cream and new girl

and the promise i'd sit on the other end of the couch.

tru luv, ppl.

oh, and let's give a shout out to my doctor

who told us not to be "intimate" so i wouldn't get cory sick.

down with the sickness.

rsv has quite literally taken over our home. jude and ezra are infected. i haven't gone to the doctor to confirm it, i'm pretty sure i have it too. yay. so we're just chillin in quarantine, coughing and snotting all over each other. except ez, his boogs are too far up his nose we had to rent a fancy super snot sucker to clear his airway. did you know that until they're about six months old, babies are exclusive nose breathers? the more you know, ya know.

our throats are raw from all the coughing we're doing. it's so sad to watch jude and ezra cough. their little faces get so red and their eyes water. during lunch on monday jude coughed so hard she laid her head down on the table and covered her eyes as if to say, "i quit, mama. this is too hard."

i've also decided i'm going to be that parent whose kids end up getting fatter when they're sick. if all jude wants to eat is fries and veggie straws and popsicles and cheese, that's a-okay by me. calories, baby. i'll stuff her full of spinach and carrots when she's more willing to eat.

anyway, here are some pictures of simpler, less infected times.

full disclosure:
all solo pictures of ez are two months old.
i refuse to believe he is three months and 12 lbs 12 oz.
so i'm just going to keep looking at pictures of his skinny little one-month old self.
back when his eyes and nose were too big for his face
and his forehead was all sorts of crusty.  

gimme all the soup.

nothing breaks my heart more 

than a sick baby. 

except maybe two sick babies.

at the same time. 

especially when they're both mine. 

judie girl and cory are down for the count.

which means our home will be filled with 

 mystery science theater 3000,

daniel tiger's neighborhood, 

and heartbreaking little baby coughs 

for the next little bit. 

on the bright side,

i don't have to share my queso with 

a n y b o d y . 

and, 

popsicles for everyone. 

wiiknd: we spent the whole time quoting "kings of summer."

death cold.

blog stalking.
facebook stalking.
tissue mountain.
goldfish crackers.
mediocre television.
chicken dumpling soup.
fresh rolls.
the voice.

death cold.
changing table.
door shims/shins/shivs.
push-free deadbolt.
ice cream.
the voice.

death cough.
jolly ranchers = cough drops.
new ward introductions.
chapel shouts.
"it's brEEsa."
speed cleaning.
a visit from nonna.
baby steps.
the voice.
mustard plaster, ftw.

what i would give for a shot of nyquil right about now.

i feel like i'm dying.

scratchy throat.

itchy ears.

alternating stuffy nostrils.

a pounding head.

body aches.

you know, all the fun stuff.

before you tell me to pop some day/nyquil,

sit down to an antm marathon

and stop whining,

you need to know i'm that pregnant girl

who refuses to take any medication

no matter the circumstance.

even this death cold.

i sure wish i had some essential oils

or some other form of hippie voodoo to cure this cold.

or at least let me get some decent sleep.

until then,

i'll just have to stare at this gorilla face

until it hypnotizes me to sleep.

i feel it should be noted i found this image

by searching, "liz lemon sick."

what the what?

i'm just grateful i didn't accidentally stumble upon

an unwanted/vomit-inducing nic cage picture. 

p.s. we're going to b-dubbs tonight for a birthday dinner

 and i'm going to cry if my sense of taste isn't back by then.

i've been singing about wings for weeks. 

i need them.

pros and cons to having a sick boo for two days.

pros:

having my bff with me all day long.
an endless supply of cuddles.
perfecting my grilled cheeses.
srsly. golden goodness. mmm.
mommy practice.
toy story shaped chicken noodle soup.
movie marathons.
sleeping in.

cons:
grocery shopping alone.
giving up control of the remote.
thank heavens i snuck in an episode of the vineyard.
going through separation anxiety now that he's healed.

sidenote:
my sister started sending me daily pictures of nicolas cage.
i don't think she's ever going to stop.
it's times like this i hate modern technology.

when a day off is also a sick day it's only natural to do the following.

watch enough 30 rock

to deserve some night cheese.

procrastinate writing wedding "thank you" cards

with homemade valentine's cards

you will [also] probably never get around to mailing.

watch toddler's and tiaras

until you hate yourself and every five-year-old

with better makeup and hair than you.

self-medicate with ginger ale

to the point of bursting.

webmd yourself into a paranoid frenzy

and get upset when facebook and instagram

aren't updated every time 

you click refresh.

paint your nails.

mess up your nails.

repaint your nails.

realize you will never be good at nail art.

accept defeat in the form of a glitter topcoat. 

sit on your livingroom floor and cry

because your husband is on a business trip

and you got an eggshell in your brownies.

| | | | |

let us all just take a moment

and thank the heavens we have passed this hump

and it's just one more day

'til friday.

halle-freaking-lujah. 

i'll take a swig-a-that.

maybe it's the flu talking,

but i think pepto is beautiful.

just beautiful.

i also enjoy the taste of pepto.

this is not the flu talking.

i had the unfortunate chance to experience

generic pepto a few weeks ago,

after my onion ring massacre,

and i did not enjoy that little shot of pink

as much as i should have.

not.at.all.

confession.

yesterday, i licked the medicine cup clean.

cory witnessed the incident

and said he worried how much time

our future children would spend with me.

then he said i was weird for

liking nyquil.

i believe his exact words were,

" who wants to invent a pepto-nyquil combo shot?

what person enjoys those flavors enough

to combine them?"

i do.

i enjoy those flavors.

and candy-coated advil

and cough drops that taste like creme savers.

and no, i don't have a "problem"

but if i'm going to be sick,

i'm going to enjoy it,

dammit!

i was trying on sparkly leggings when i realized i'm a terrible person.

for the past two days,
cory has been deathly ill.

yesterday i promised to pick up

soup, orange juice, saltines, cough drops and dayquil.

so after work,

i zipped on over to target to buy supplies.

but on my way to get them,

i got sidetracked by a couple of clearance racks
screaming at me.

they were practically begging me to look at them.

it feels like years since i have had the chance

to browse on my own.

author's note: 

shopping alone is like my yoga.

it's also like my crack.

so i did what any horrible person would do,

i pushed my poor, sick husband to the back of my head

and i took my time.

i filled my cart to the brim and snuck

every single item in the dressing room with me.

i tried on each piece,

imagined where i would wear it,

how i would do my hair,

and cory's reaction when he saw it.

and after all that hunting and selecting and adjusting
and just a little self-guilting,

i narrowed my pile down to one.

purple, cute, fancy or cazjy. 

it was perfect.

i hung each item back on its hanger

so the dressing room attendant wouldn't hate me

and went on my merry sick-supply-shopping way.

i remembered his pulp free orange juice

and triple berry fruit breezers.

i threw in some broccoli cheddar soup and oreos

to ease my troubled mind.

when i got home and confessed what i had done,

he told me my shirt was pretty and "so you,"

and was slightly upset i didn't buy myself anything else.

i mean...really?

other than his affinity for pulp free orange juice,

he's perfect.

...denim chicken...?

being sick has always been the worst.

always.

but having to work while sick

is the absolute worst.

my uniform for the past two days

has revolved around comfort.

leggings + loose dress + blazer + scarf + ponytail.

tights + "fancy" sweater + scarf + bun.

comfort is key.

if i can feel like a baby wrapped in a blanket

and have it be accepted by society,

i'll do it.

back to the point of this story.

even though being sick sucks, 

i believe it ignites my creativity.

this morning i had some of my best ideas to date.

dead serious.

idea one:

 a dress made out of sweats.

idea two: 

toast butter that tastes like donut glaze. 

chloraseptic lozenges taste icky.

i'm sick.

scratchy throat.

tired eyes.

stuffy nose.

blah.

on a higher note.
this cover is amazing.
i loove how he changed the words.
 it went from skankalicious to something that makes me melt.
sing it baybee.

big head.

turns out i'm sick again.

i guess it's funny for the sick fairies to make kids sick during summertime.

stupid fairies.

actually, they're more like demons.

i told my mama and she told me to see a doctor.

so i'm going.

hopefully the doctor can give me something to fix me.

then maybe i can hear and swallow and breath again without crying.

just kidding.

i'm not really crying.

but it does hurt.

ouchie.

oh ya.

my head feels swollen.

i juuuust want to sleeep.

buried treasure

i came home this weekend for various reasons.

1. to be cured from this awful illness by my magical momma.

2. to celebrate america's birthday with my familia.

i left my laptop in provo hoping to escape technology for a few days

buuut that didn't last long. 

i was looking through the pictures we have on our community desktop
and discovered these little beauties.

i took these pictures in paris {france} on my europe trip after ninth grade.

i thought i was so artsy.

enjoy.

sidenote:  i think almost all of these pictures were taken with a disposable camera

{i like to call them click-click cameras, just fyizzle}

things i notice/wonder

welcome to a little segment i like to call "things i notice-slash-wonder."

let us begin.

1. why is it that every "scene/emo" kid from high school is a whiz at photoshop?

2. is it me, or does everyone with a camera now consider themselves a photographer?

3. why do i feel deathly ill the day i decide to go into work to be "responsible"?

4. hydrating hasn't helped this headache.

5. saltines and orange juice are crazy delicious.

6. the faster internet really is worth it.

7. shimmy-ing in bed is funny.

8. interesting/confidential conversations occur in the wee hours of the morn'.

9. people tell you you "look nice" when you haven't gotten ready at all.

10. dayquil is ineffective.

11. deleting facebook is nigh impossible.

12. coughing/sniffling in class gets you weird looks from your peers.

13. not having a voice makes laughing funny/painful.

candy coated.

i like to suck on my advil before i swallow it.

mm mm candy coated goodness.

just thought you should know. 

keep sippin the sauce.

hello world.

meet my medicine:

orange juice.

{preferably with some pulp. this kind = no pulp =  me = disappointed}

saltines.

ginger ale.

they work magic.

not even kidding.

let's hope i'm better by tomorrow.

oh ya.

these also help with a sore throat.

my roommate just pointed something out.

"breezy breezers."

get it?

they call me breezy.

so these are like my drug.

so it's basically like i'm fixing myself with my own medicine.

now that's legit.

yes, that was my face right after this golden discovery was made.

sickface.

bad news.

i be illin'.

i can't talk.

my head hurts.

and my throat is killing me.

good thing mah gurl jackie has some good tips...
maybe i should get an aquarium too so i can watch my fish swim back and forth all night when
i can't sleep "not one bit" because i'm sick. 

what would we do without youtube?

i lied.

brissa = still sick.

ugh.

beverage.

WARNING: This is going to be a very unorthodox blog post.

But...once again, seeing as how it's mine, I don't really care.

I just thought I'd warn you.

Because, you know, I'm nice like that.

I am going to describe to you my weekend through the beverages I drank.

Friday.

Water.

My trusty sidekick of a water bottle planned a mutany.

He decided it'd be funny to be half-way open and empty himself in my Ecuador bag.

{luckily my camera and phone didn't drown}.

Pepto-Bismol.

I had the worst stomach ache ever after the talent show.

I felt like I was pregnant with a baby ninja....again.

{don't worry. no onions this time}

But not even pink magic would make it go away.

:(

Saturday.

Water.

To take my Day-Quil.

That's right folks...Brissa was a sicky.

Ginger Ale.

This is my go-to beverage when I'm ill.

Nothing like a good ol' cup o' ginger and some saltines to battle sick germs.

{this did more for me than the stupid pink "magic" did}

Powerade.

Mountain Berry Blast.

Blue drank.

mmmmm.

Had to get those missing electrolytes in my somehow.

Sunday.

H2O.

Bubbly.

Blue Drank.

Repeat.

=

A healthy Brissa.

sick eye.

have you ever been so ill that even your eyes feel sick? 
my eyes are very sick and very tired.
all i want to do is sleep.
but i have to read two issues of the new york times.
i don't like reading when all my eyes want to do is sleep. 
saltines and orange juice have become my staple.
mmm..delicious.
i hope i stop being sick soon. 
i can't miss work tomorrow. 
dang gina.
sometimes i wish i didn't have to work and go to school at the same time.
it's stressful.
but i gotsta make da big bucks. 
okay.
i'm done whining.
ugh..how annoying of me.
please click here for my formal apology.