Wednesday, January 13, 2010

satan's onions are red

...just like his panties...

Today I decided to put the red onion my mama bought me whilst I was home over the break to good use.  
Since I was craving a red onion and tomato salad I decided to make one.  The idea sounded really good at the time.  I was excited during the slicing and dicing process and even the first few bites were delicious.  But all the sudden my beloved red onions decided to attack!!  The assault was definitely pre-planned.  The evil little layers congregated in one giant purple mass on my innocent spoon and cheered on their way down to my poor unsuspecting tummy. 
Suddenly.  I didn’t feel too hot.
The only way I can describe the ruckus going on in my stomach is to liken it unto a woman pregnant with a ninja.  
My stomach felt like a oniony tornado and my esophagus was burning because of evil onion-ninja kicks. 
Don’t worry kids.  I didn’t toss my cookies.  But I have vowed to not eat onions for a little while.  My poor little estomago can’t handle the betrayal again.

Curse you satan onions….curse you!

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