i'm fairly traditional when it comes
to things that scare the living daylights out of me.
bears attacking me while i camp.
animals attacking me while i use a biffy while camping.
anything creepy crawling on me.
being separated from my buddy while scuba diving.
you know, normal stuff.
but the thing i am most afraid of.
the one thing in the world that shakes me to my core
and truly shows how
shallow and selfish i am
is my legitimate fear of having ugly babies.
no one will tell you your child is ugly.
they will compliment the color of their eyes,
or the thickness of their hair,
or an article of clothing.
they'll even go so far as to say,
"oh what a fun baby!"
but they will never look you in the eye and say,
"i don't get it. how did this happen?"
i know i'll love my brown ginger babies no matter what,
but i also know i will be blinded by love.
they'll all be perfect to me.
and herein lies our problem.
if i ever have ugly babies,
don't tell me.
call them fun.
say they have a unique laugh.
tell me they'll be smart one day.
save me from the truth.
did you watch friday night lights?
there is no way coach taylor and tami taylor
would have everrrr made a gracie bell.
and if they're not safe,
moral of the story:
i am a horrible person.