Wednesday, August 7, 2013

plop plop fizz fizz

"i faked a seizure in fourth grade.
i put some alka-seltzer in my mouth
and went up to the lunch lady.
she realized it was fake when the foam stopped
and sent me to the principal's office.
she was always so mean to me."

sometimes i pray our kids
turn out like cory.
witty, clever, smart, handsome, ginger.
but then i hear stories like this
and part of me hopes
all those prayers i said
didn't make it all the way to heaven.
then i quickly beg pray for our children
to be cursed with my guilty conscious
and the need to constantly please everyone.

but something in my heart
tells me there will be no balance.
there will be no peace.
there will be no sanity.


Kelli Anderson said...

in second grade my friend sassed at the custodian during lunch. it was so sassy i thought she was joking so i stood up next to her, popped my hip, did the duckface whipping mt head side to side, waved my finger, and followed along thinking i was so getting in on the joke. i hope i've gotten better at picking up on sarcasm, or lack thereof. it was the one and only time i got in trouble my entire elementary career. sometimes i think that custodian just had a really fragile ego because did he really need to tell the principal? what kind of adult male can't handle two second graders sassing at him, one of them under the impression that it was banter?

Tiffany @ Polka Dotted Cats said...

I hope your kids don't try to WALK when they fake seizures. That should've been the first tell :)

kylee said...

CORY!!!!!!! that story!!!! i just have no words right now!