i had a dream
there were two baby hippos
in my apartment.
my dad told me i could shrink them using a magic remote.
i found one and shrunk him a bit
and went to find his brother.
he was going crazy in the living room.
uncontrollably shaking his head, making baby hippo noises,
gnashing his weird hippo teeth.
the kid was completely bonkers.
i tried to shrink him but was unsuccessful.
i went back to talk to everyone hiding out in the room
to formulate a plan to get him to stand still long enough
so we could shrink him.
bungee cords? drugs? an ambush?
he must have known my plan and followed me
to the back room
because the next thing i knew,
that freaking hippo baby bit my butt.
that's how i woke up.
a hippo baby bit my butt.