after his first bath,
mat decided to pee on himself,
his towel, his blanket,
and my leggings.
we pick our softest hand towel to dry him
after round two.
it was a glorious buttercream number
from bed, bath and beyond.
he made this adorable face then suddenly and effortlessly
pooped the most vibrant green
i have ever seen in my life.
after his third bath,
i was sure his bowels were empty.
there was no way any yellow or green
was getting out of his system now.
wrong.
i was playing with his little feet
when i felt the warm liquid on my wrist.
i called it quits
and baby wiped that shiz.
homeboy didn't deserve another bath.
13 comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Who knew baby poop/pee could be so poetic?!
you are going to get a gold star in the afterlife. handling other peoples kids is hard work!
Hahaha oh newborns. Somehow they know when to let it all out. He is sooooooo cute, btw.
Hahaha oh newborns. Somehow they know when to let it all out. He is sooooooo cute, btw.
hahaahahahaha babies are just straight up crayyyy!
hahaahahahaha babies are just straight up crayyyy!
I am laughing so hard. Way to be a stalwart caregiver!
HAHA!! love it :) so is this your sister or brother in laws new baby? also, the most dramatic 15 min of my life with a newborn was when i was changing his diaper at 2am, all bleary eyed and he projectile pooped ALL OVER the front of my shirt...i was in shock for a full 30 seconds i think, i didn't even know that was possible!!
Oh man. A page from my own book!
I'm dying. That's hilarious. I'm sorry, it's probably not funny yet to you but I swear it will be soon!
hahah please see title of post below
HAHA! Amazing.
babies are NUTS. and that newborn wanker and pooper wander around like they don't have a clue what they're doing for the first 2 months. i love that this happened to you because it's a good growing pain (and a hilarious story to tell.)
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