Thursday, May 31, 2012

i'm secretly 77 years old.

despite being years younger 
i enjoy eating activia for breakfast.

i blow my nose more than any other person
on my floor at work.
please note,
 i am also the youngest person on my floor.

everyday around lunch time,
i'm overcome with an intense
longing for a nap.
by 2:50 that longing has turned into a necessity.
it's days like this i wish americans believed in siestas.

my hair falls out.
in the shower. in my brush. on my shirts.
it just, falls out.
i'm not going bald
but i'm definitely losing follicles.

i can't tell you how many times i've said,
"i'm just not as young as i used to be."
in the past two weeks.

sidenote:
don't eat mini-wheats for breakfast
and activia for lunch.
it doesn't matter how bad you want yogurt,
don't give in.
it's too much fiber for one day.

10 comments:

Kirstyn said...

I am losing hair too! It's a miracle I'm not bald by now. And naps seriously are the best thing ever.

whatevergatsby.com said...

omg. there really needs to be an old folks retirement community. for young folks. because i love prunes. and watching oprah. and a good nap. and definitely think the whippersnappers' skirts are way too short these days.

xoxo myrtle.

Jaclyn said...

you are hilarious. so hilarious.

Ren- Lady Of The Arts said...

my hair falls out in the shower and brush too- I don't think that's an old person thing- my mom says its normal!

Elisha(: said...

hahahahahahhaha. too funny. ;) I too lovvvvvvvvveeeee naps in the afternoon!! I LOVE THEM.

x.

Crystle said...

ditto, ditto, ditto. i've overdone it on the fiber before....it's a mistake you only need to make once.

Christianna said...

My hair falls out all the time as well! It's crazy! We are old ladies in 20's bodies!!!

Shaylynn... I blahwg It's True. said...

Too much fiber in a day?

I am grossed out. However, not as grossed out as I am when I think about you being a really old man trapped in a young womans body.

You're a man, that's right. I can take your email response, I'm not afraid.. I know you responses will be delayed.. that geriatric effect.

Liz said...

I think I am too....
I'm even with ya on the fiber thing! EW!

Liz said...

I think I am too....
I'm even with ya on the fiber thing! EW!